Lebanese Jester

Me, my Lebanon, and I.com weblog

As far as I am concerned !

Patriarch Rai can grow his beard, wear a turban and take turn to lead us to yet another (devastating) divine victory.

Walid Jumblat can get on his Harley and ride unto the sunset never to be heard of again.

Nabih Berri can turn parliament to a big Roman orgy.

Samir Geagea can decide become a monk in the hope to be canonized after his passing.

Saad Hariri can turn downtown Beirut into a red light district and become its higher paid customer.

Michel Aoun can direct and star in a new version of Mel brook’s history of the world.

Amine Gemayel can create his own line of hair care products.

Talal Arslan can open up a free psychiatric ward for all those who have an inferiority complex.

Hassan Nasrallah can get on his white horse waiving his sword (like Mar Elias) protecting all Arab widows and orphans.

As far as I am concerned, they, and all our political class, past and current might not even have a place reserved for them in hell, for the devil might be afraid that they will oust him.

September 25, 2011 Posted by | Politics | , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Violence begets violence.

I can understand the anger and the frustration, but I cannot accept the similarities (save the detail of armed thugs) with what I condemned vehemently in 2008; the similarities were there for me to condemn. Yes “sticks and stones will not break my bones” as the saying goes, but this does not in any way justify stooping to their level and falling into their well laid trap. All that was missing was the herd of mopeds, AK47’s, RPG’s, and militia uniforms. This does not make the impact any less gruesome and worrying.
On the other hand, the so called peaceful demo in downtown Beirut did not attract the (expected or even hoped for) crowd. And you wonder why?
Once you took it upon yourself (Ya Tayyar Al Mustakbal) to portray this fight as typical Sunni betrayal, forgetting the very essence of the Cedar Revolution, you forgo your allies who ensured you the majority in parliament. This was supposed to be the ultimate fight for justice and freedom, and you have chosen to derail it.
Goatee Saad has amassed one mistake after another, and when his last chance of redemption was offered; his “tayyar” passed kilometers next to it. This is not a fight between the two predominant Muslim sects. This is a fight for the survival of this BIBLICAL LAND OF THE CEDARS, Hassan Nasrallah’s speech today proves this point.
Downtown Beirut tonight showed a very shy gathering and not to my surprise. For tonight Saad and Hassan made it all about a struggle of influence between 2 out of the 18 sects, that are nothing but couple of parts of the Lebanese canvas.
Fellow Lebanese at the risk of sounding like a broken record : “wake up and smell the cyanide” , say NO to all of them!
My fellow Lebanese, I leave you with the following:

And to those of you who have inspirations way beyond our borders:

January 26, 2011 Posted by | George Harisson, Imagine, John Lennon | , , , , | Leave a comment

The ultimate failure of the “prodigal” son!

This past Saturday, amidst media frenzy; goatee stuttering spineless Saad took his “courage” into his own hands (or shall I say executed a Saudi command) and ventured onto a trip to the land of bloodily love. This lost child (with a new found selective memory, just like every Lebanese he and M14’s represent) chose to forget about Syrian arrest warrants issued against his closets of allies, by those he publicly claimed had a hand in the killing of his father.

So he went alone, not by choice.
No it was not an official visit, for there was no official invitation. So what was it then? A similar visit to the one Walid Jumblat did after the killing of his father (and by whom, one might wonder)? Has it become a part of Lebanese culture to pay respect and homage to our slayer?
Humor me if you will, for I am a part of the “sheeple” that constitute this “great” nation of ours. I have tried (unlike many others) to find a hint of logic or a half cooked excuse for Saad “lonely” walk along the presidential corridor, and the obvious (long lasting) grin on Bashar’s face, before the (what has become) famous kisses on the “killer’s” cheeks. I still came out empty. My little, abused brain by so many empty slogans, cannot still comprehend nor accept such a blatant “you fucked me, thank you sir may I have another”.
Yes many of you (even those who have warrants issued against them) may argue that this visit stems from the fact that our dear stuttering idiot of a prime minister is acting as a representative of the people (my foot, for he forgot why the people voted for him), and has grown beyond personal feelings and vendetta. But a few of you harbor this bitter feeling that he (and his allies) were unworthy of our votes in the past elections; for he has capitulated.
A devil’s (Saad that is) advocate might argue that in view of:
French policy of “rapprochement”(with Syria that is), headed by some “arriviste” gigolo who would have been better off pleasuring his sexually edible wife (which I guess he is doing).
A first “African American” president with arms extended, having inherited a failed foreign policies from his “new born Christian” predecessor with a “Divine” (failed) mission.
A local Mullah armed to the teeth threatening to wage a holly Jihad against fellow Muslims “first” in order to establish his long “pipe” dream of Wilayet al Faqih.
An orange demented “Iznogood” to whom he made the most concessions.
A major player in the region who still stands defiant; and is still building its nuclear capabilities, and sponsoring local foes.

Stuttering Saad went to Syria, embraced Bashar, kissed him on the cheek, and had the reception of kings.
For me, that is a problem. That is a true description of why we need “new blood”; but what pisses me off the most is when someone like our dear ex President (monsieur 20%) Amine Gemayel has the audacity to say, and I quote “I was amongst the fist supporters of Hariri’s visit to Syria”, but WAIT FOR IT…………..”the wounds run deep”. What wounds if I may ask, the one they inflicted on your departed son?
Wlek ألله يرحم أمواتنا for you have sold them short.

December 21, 2009 Posted by | Politics | , , , , | 5 Comments

When I will become a Roumieh resident.

Goatee Saad  met with the demented general. Rumor has it that the meeting was so friendly that now there is talk of an MOU between the Future movement and the FPM, similar to the MOU with Hizbollah.

Oh joyful day!

I do not pay much attention to what is written in local papers, for the fate of my country is in no way a local affair. But I know that the worst is yet to come, and I know that I will not be kept silent. So just in case I find my freedom being taking away from me (once again), this is part of the concert I would like to enjoy in the prison I will be at (not Nancy and Haifa).

October 6, 2009 Posted by | Lebanon, Music | , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments